Freshly crowned Miss Plus Size India International on fat shaming and success

Wrisha Dutta can do cartwheels at 35 years of age Shersquod do them right now on the terrace of her parentrsquos home in quaint Bamanwada in Andheri East but her crown and sash would fall off She was a shotput discus throw Kung Fu champ in school but remembers being called baby elephant before she turned 10 On her 13th birthday as she sliced her favourite Merwanrsquos cake to distribute among friends one remarked ldquoPura kha legi yerdquo She didnrsquot eat cake that yearOn October 19 the day before we met her she turned 35 and ate the same favourite lemon crackle cake without guilt Itrsquos her first birthday as Maven Miss Plus Size India International 2023 crowned at a beauty pageant that brings together women from the global Indian diasporaldquoBecause of our shared traumardquo the professional singer actor and model tells us ldquothe atmosphere was one of camaraderie and not competition Instead of being starved to fit into a glittering gown we were taught about nutrition If someone hadnrsquot eaten wersquod pack her off during rehearsals to go grab a bite We werenrsquot weighed every day Instead of samplesized clothes to squeeze into a former contestantmdashPriyanka Miglanimdashcustommade my gown It was more about personality developmentmdashto amplify our giftsrdquoDutta was raised in a Bengali household of music arts with working parents who shared chores Her father is a Tai Chi instructor and she was always active So all the qualities associated with weightmdashlaziness unfitness overeating unhealthy eatingmdashbaffled her Her body facilitates play Also she sings She was signed on by the athleisure brand Aastey after they spotted her at a gig She has sung a song in Haddi a transgendercentric film starring Nawazuddin SiddiquildquoI looked around for idols and found Usha Uthup A majestic kanjeevaram and large bindiwearing performer who belts out jazzrdquo she says ldquoLike her I also do power vocals but I would be rejected for gigs because of how I look But Irsquod turn it around in my favour by telling corporates lsquoDonrsquot you think if your employees see a woman like them on stage it would be good for teambuildingrsquo I come from a very supportive ecosystem of blood and chosen family and am committed to living my every truthmdashI am pansexual and nonbinary but donrsquot mind being called sheherrdquoShe also found strength in fellow Bengali and beauty queen Sushmita Sen who said in an interview once ldquoIf you hold on to your rejections long enough they turn into acceptancerdquoSo what is the cost of living in and building a society that fears fat Itrsquos not being able to admit publicly that you are attracted to a chubby personhellip to the point that you may marry one who society deems beautiful but you have no desire for Discontent in the intimate world can seep into every other ldquoBy the time I was in college the male attention I drew told me I was attractive but itrsquos not a linear journey no They would not admit in public that they liked merdquo Dutta had a boyfriend for three years in her early 20s who did not want to hold her hand in public ldquoMy parents knew about himrdquo she says ldquobut he didnrsquot tell his parents because you know what unevolved parents look for in a briderdquo Shersquos now married to a man who has been her best friend for 14 years Both gamers date night is playing FirstPerson Shooters like Counter Strike and MMORPGs sidebyside on separate PCsBut there were years she would not eat in public afraid of being shamed Because what else do we say to a person like her with a plate but ldquoBass kar Kitna khayegirdquo ldquoEven as a child relatives would say to me Donrsquot eat so much Then came a time if I was offered a second helping as a guest I would refuse even though I love eating and cooking Crsquomon Irsquom Bengalirdquo And when you donrsquot eat in public you shame binge in private The turning point came in 2016 when she met with a road accident and was afflicted with multiple organ dysfunction ldquoAfter seeing death up so closerdquo says ldquoI just decided I just wanted to be happy I didnrsquot want to miss out on any funrdquoWhat happens when you recognise that beauty is a social constructmdasha creature confined to time and economymdashand harnessed to sell tools of selfhate and oppression It could be ironic that though a genetic roulette decides how we look society makes it the first quality we assess a person byIf you are Dutta you make inroads into the system Show that thin is not the only way to be fit To represent the various shapes within the plussized spectrum ldquoI am a plus petiterdquo Or refuse to play the heartbroken and stuffingherfaceinevery scene BFF to the heroine Take part in a beauty pageant so that you get a foot in the door to model for beauty brands fashion and be in movies ldquoI want roles where my talents fit into the scriptmdashmy singing for instancerdquo she says ldquoWhy canrsquot I play a musician A normal personrdquoBecause you dear are XXXordinary