How to deal with a hate attack

Here is a story not entirely fiction Mustafa 40 was in a park in Delhi with his child only 18 months old He was a goodlooking man well travelled and as a UN negotiator had served to help defuse confrontations in conflict areas He wore a welltrimmed beard and a skull capA woman in a jogging suit approached him walking briskly She spoke clearly and directly to himldquoYoursquore a terrorist All of you arerdquo she saidMustafa knew to remain calm in such situations He stood up and folded his arms saying nothing except the single word OkayldquoYou blow up buildings you kill children and mothersrdquo she saidldquoOkayrdquoldquoYou kill cows You insult HindusrdquoldquoNo madam I do not kill cows And Hindus are my friendsrdquoLeft The full chilling story of Ashish Prasharrsquos encounter with a racist is at this QR code If you want to know what happened when he put his video out on the social media please read this Right Ashish Prasharrsquos inspiring TEDx speech on forgiveness and second chances can be viewed at this QR codeMustafa stood his ground staying calm and unconfrontational At one point he picked up his phone and began filming the womanldquoYou should go back to Pakistanrdquo she shouted A crowd had gathered Some cheered and some began making reels for Instagram Mustafa picked up his son and slowly began backing away from this vitriolldquoStop taking my video you filth Give me that camerardquoShe was directly in front of him now His child was whimperingldquoDdonrsquot touch me madamrdquo said Mustafa ldquoYou are scaring my babyrdquoldquoYour baby should die that would teach you a lessonrdquo she said lunging for his camera ldquoGet the fmdash out of my country you filthy bastardrdquoWas this just rudeness or bad behaviour Would you say the woman was broadly justified but should have chosen a more private setting for this exchange Or would you say the man was asking for troubleShould she be charged with a hate crime and sentenced to a long jail termThe conversation above really happened almost verbatim and quite a bit longer in a playground in New York The father involved was Ashish Prashar and the woman who came at him was identified weeks later as Hadasa Bozakkaravani 48 Seeing the blackandwhite Palestinian scarf called a keffiyeh that Ashish was wearing she mistook him for a Muslim During the aggressive confrontation she threw things at him including her cup of hot coffee nearly scalding the babyAshish is neither Palestinian nor Muslim he is Punjabi born in London and speaks with a British accent The scarf was a gift from a Palestinian Christian ten years earlier As a political worker he has witnessed over and over the worst and the best of what humans bring to the tableTo read the chilling story of the tsunami of hate that rose when he posted his 47second video online follow the QR link on topWe live in countries where our leaders tell us who we are and who we should hate We comply like sheep and dehumanise those on whose backs our leaders paint a target In the USA it is black and brown people and people of Asian origin In our great democracy it is Muslims and growingly anyone who is not Hindu by religionI have close friends who hold wine glasses at parties and openly state that all Muslims are criminals and should be wiped out Everyone nods as though this is axiomatic Hate is oblivious to reality facts or reason it needs a glass of blood No use pointing out for example that Muslims are a mere 14 per cent of India and are not overrunning the country Or that their birth rate has been dropping sharply down from 44 in 199293 to 24 in 2020 almost at par with the Hindu rateof 19When conversation and discussion seem futile remind yourself that if you stop thinking for yourself someone else will do it for you Your government for example always stands readyWhat is the best response to blind hate in a time when everyone treats outrage and irrational anger as entitlements Surprisingly the answer comes from Ashishrsquos own lifeIn 2011 as part of a team working with the Middle East Peace Envoy Tony Blair Ashish watched a reconciliation meeting in Sierra Leone which was healing from a 10year civil war A mother was standing face to face with a child who had been abducted from his family and trained to killmdash and had killed her daughter and baby son Now as he stood with his head bowed she was asked by the council what punishment she would consider appropriate for the boyHolding her husbandrsquos hand the woman said ldquoOur country has lost too many of our children Wersquod like the child to be released into our custody our care so that we can raise him as our own childrdquoIn a world where humans are turning bestial being humane is perhaps the only way to restore humanityYou can reach C Y Gopinath at cygopigmailcomSend your feedback to mailbagmiddaycomThe views expressed in this column are the individualrsquos and donrsquot represent those of the paper